Joe Schmoe
Neither of us have ever had kids. What will be the biggest challenge? How much does day care cost? Diapers? Etc.? Will I be able to finish college? I need to hear about other peoples' experiences.
Answer
My husband is an accountant and figured this out as much as he could. Please be aware that we live in a high cost area so we are paying more than say, the Midwest.
1. Medical care - Maternity care and the doctor's fee for delivery is usually a flat rate. This includes all your prenatal visits and a basic vaginal delivery fee for the delivering physician. This does not cover blood work, ultrasounds, urology testing, vaginal cultures, etc. These are billed at whatever rate you have with your insurer. The actual stay at the hospital will be a room, bed, nursing plus materials cost. I would call your local hospital and insurer to figure out approximately what this will come to.
2. Day care. Completely depends on who, how and where. Count on at least $800/month on the low side for home-run daycare with much more for a franchise facility. We are fortunate in our area because we can get qualified nannies who are recent immigrants who will cook, clean and watch the children for $1000/month.
3. Diapers. Cloth diapers are more work, but less expensive. Cloth diapers now are entirely different from what they used to be. http://www.fuzzibunz.com/ http://www.happyheinys.com/ If you go with disposables, buy them from Sam's Club or Costco or equivalent. I would buy wipes in bulk from them as well. If we buy them from a local store, they run about $18-20/pack. The packs get smaller as the sizes get bigger. They start at around 40 diapers and go down from there. Babies go through about a dozen diapers a day to start and then taper down some. You will spend a ton of money here.
4. Feeding. Breastfeeding saves well over $1000/year. You will need a breast pump which runs up to $350. (Buy a good one such as a Medela dual electric.) You will also need smaller items such as nursing bras, nursing pads, etc. You will want to have some bottles and maybe a bottle warmer on hand so that she can express her milk with the pump, and others can feed the baby when she is not with him. I can't speak to formula feeding. We aren't planning on going that route.
5. Setup costs. Buying used can save you a ton of money, but you will need to do research to ensure that the items meet safety standards. I would suggest www.craigslist.com. Do NOT buy a used crib mattress. Buy this new for sanitary and safety reasons. I would also suggest that you buy a new infant car seat and base. If the car is ever in an accident of any kind, the infant seat and base must be replaced, even if they look perfectly undamaged. I wouldn't risk someone's selling you a seat that may have been in an accident. We had to buy new since in our area, the cost weirdly ends up being the same between the 'normal stuff' that we would buy and the used 'ultra-luxury' stuff that people sell. We budgeted $2000 and came in just below that, but that included everything - car seat, base, stroller, crib, mattress, changing table, all possible accessories, breast pump with all other breastfeeding items, bottles and nipples, bottle warmer, toys, glider rocker with ottoman, clothes, 500 wipes, 2 -3 weeks worth of diapers, etc. For this amount, we completely and fully outfitted an entire nursery by shopping sales, generous baby showers, and spending a lot of time online looking for quality, but less expensive baby furniture. We did buy a changing table that is really a dresser with a change table on top so that we didn't have to buy him a dresser when he is a toddler or to use for both children if we have a second (dresser for the first and changing table top for the second).
Our pregnancy was a complete and total surprise. (We were told that I probably couldn't have children.) We immediately began to save and make financial arrangements. We also reduced our expenses by cutting down on simple things such as my husband's morning stop for coffee, dinners out on Fridays, visiting movie theatres, etc. We instead starting doing free activities or lower costs things such as renting movies, going for walks in the free botantical gardens, eating out at cheap restaurants, and being more careful to buy grocery items that are on sale.
The baby was the first grandchild on both sides and the first baby in the family for several years so people went 'nutz-so' on gift giving which was very generous and a tremendous help. I would not be shy about registering for whatever you need. People love to buy for babies and are truly happy to give you gifts. Even co-workers surprised me with a homemade knit baby blanket and other presents.
My father (who is around a genius IQ) had a wife, two children and full-time, nightshift menial job sweeping coal dust in a power plant after being discharged from the Army. It took him nine years part-time, but he graduated from college and went on to have a good career. He started when I (the oldest child) was seven years told so I was 16 when he graduated. It was inspirational to us children and a constant reminder of the importance of diligence and hard work. When I went to college and got discouraged, I would think "Well, if Dad could do it, what I am getting so worked up about?" To this day, when someone mentions the word 'character', I think 'Dad'. Dad defines character. Staying in school may be hard, but I would strongly encourage you to do it.
Growing up, we didn't have all that much, but I had a very happy childhood which I look back on with nothing but fondness. I remembered being shocked when I grew older and realized that I had been a 'poor kid'. All I knew was that I was dearly loved, content and came from a stable, loving, happy home with parents who cared for me dearly.
My husband is an accountant and figured this out as much as he could. Please be aware that we live in a high cost area so we are paying more than say, the Midwest.
1. Medical care - Maternity care and the doctor's fee for delivery is usually a flat rate. This includes all your prenatal visits and a basic vaginal delivery fee for the delivering physician. This does not cover blood work, ultrasounds, urology testing, vaginal cultures, etc. These are billed at whatever rate you have with your insurer. The actual stay at the hospital will be a room, bed, nursing plus materials cost. I would call your local hospital and insurer to figure out approximately what this will come to.
2. Day care. Completely depends on who, how and where. Count on at least $800/month on the low side for home-run daycare with much more for a franchise facility. We are fortunate in our area because we can get qualified nannies who are recent immigrants who will cook, clean and watch the children for $1000/month.
3. Diapers. Cloth diapers are more work, but less expensive. Cloth diapers now are entirely different from what they used to be. http://www.fuzzibunz.com/ http://www.happyheinys.com/ If you go with disposables, buy them from Sam's Club or Costco or equivalent. I would buy wipes in bulk from them as well. If we buy them from a local store, they run about $18-20/pack. The packs get smaller as the sizes get bigger. They start at around 40 diapers and go down from there. Babies go through about a dozen diapers a day to start and then taper down some. You will spend a ton of money here.
4. Feeding. Breastfeeding saves well over $1000/year. You will need a breast pump which runs up to $350. (Buy a good one such as a Medela dual electric.) You will also need smaller items such as nursing bras, nursing pads, etc. You will want to have some bottles and maybe a bottle warmer on hand so that she can express her milk with the pump, and others can feed the baby when she is not with him. I can't speak to formula feeding. We aren't planning on going that route.
5. Setup costs. Buying used can save you a ton of money, but you will need to do research to ensure that the items meet safety standards. I would suggest www.craigslist.com. Do NOT buy a used crib mattress. Buy this new for sanitary and safety reasons. I would also suggest that you buy a new infant car seat and base. If the car is ever in an accident of any kind, the infant seat and base must be replaced, even if they look perfectly undamaged. I wouldn't risk someone's selling you a seat that may have been in an accident. We had to buy new since in our area, the cost weirdly ends up being the same between the 'normal stuff' that we would buy and the used 'ultra-luxury' stuff that people sell. We budgeted $2000 and came in just below that, but that included everything - car seat, base, stroller, crib, mattress, changing table, all possible accessories, breast pump with all other breastfeeding items, bottles and nipples, bottle warmer, toys, glider rocker with ottoman, clothes, 500 wipes, 2 -3 weeks worth of diapers, etc. For this amount, we completely and fully outfitted an entire nursery by shopping sales, generous baby showers, and spending a lot of time online looking for quality, but less expensive baby furniture. We did buy a changing table that is really a dresser with a change table on top so that we didn't have to buy him a dresser when he is a toddler or to use for both children if we have a second (dresser for the first and changing table top for the second).
Our pregnancy was a complete and total surprise. (We were told that I probably couldn't have children.) We immediately began to save and make financial arrangements. We also reduced our expenses by cutting down on simple things such as my husband's morning stop for coffee, dinners out on Fridays, visiting movie theatres, etc. We instead starting doing free activities or lower costs things such as renting movies, going for walks in the free botantical gardens, eating out at cheap restaurants, and being more careful to buy grocery items that are on sale.
The baby was the first grandchild on both sides and the first baby in the family for several years so people went 'nutz-so' on gift giving which was very generous and a tremendous help. I would not be shy about registering for whatever you need. People love to buy for babies and are truly happy to give you gifts. Even co-workers surprised me with a homemade knit baby blanket and other presents.
My father (who is around a genius IQ) had a wife, two children and full-time, nightshift menial job sweeping coal dust in a power plant after being discharged from the Army. It took him nine years part-time, but he graduated from college and went on to have a good career. He started when I (the oldest child) was seven years told so I was 16 when he graduated. It was inspirational to us children and a constant reminder of the importance of diligence and hard work. When I went to college and got discouraged, I would think "Well, if Dad could do it, what I am getting so worked up about?" To this day, when someone mentions the word 'character', I think 'Dad'. Dad defines character. Staying in school may be hard, but I would strongly encourage you to do it.
Growing up, we didn't have all that much, but I had a very happy childhood which I look back on with nothing but fondness. I remembered being shocked when I grew older and realized that I had been a 'poor kid'. All I knew was that I was dearly loved, content and came from a stable, loving, happy home with parents who cared for me dearly.
I'm crazy right?! Why do I feel this way?
J21AZZY
Ok, I am sorting things through to live on my own after high school. I feel as if I am going to be poor. That I won't have a chance to have what everyone else has. I know that I am happy having what I've got, but, I just feel like I'm insolvent 'cause I don't use what I have. I feel as if I am going to have to shop at Aldis or thrift stores all the time. No offense, I like going to both of them,but, I also look for quality in food and clothes. I know that I would to find a good job first,but, I feel that it's impossible to find teen jobs that are a little more than minimum wage,but, I know in my heart that it's not impossible. I can find it no matter if I have to find it 18 times. You probably can't understand me. I just want to stop feeling this way and I know I will be given that chance to buy that Maybelline mascara or Candies skirt. On the other hand, I feel as if that will take a long time and I don't want it to be. Please don't comment "huh". I don't what is wrong with me and why do I feel this way? I'm only 16!
Answer
Nothing is wrong with starting with minimum wage now. You gain skill and employment history. Stay dependable and have a teachable attitude. This will give you employment history for future apartment rentals. And employment history to gain better employment later on-try not to jump from job to job. The most important thing is to learn how to budget your money. For now you should try to save as much as you can. If mom and dad are patient enough-maybe they can transport you back and forth to work. Also, there is no shame in driving a used car-especially if you consider when you drive a new car off the lot and it depreciates so much. But make sure to bring someone very knowledgeable to be able to tell a lemon from a good deal. If mom and dad will let you save enough to get a car-and drive you till you can buy with cash-then save like mad. Then all you will be dealing with for the time being is car insurance. This will be the beginning of your budget. 1) Car gas, Car insurance, yearly car renewal, and whatever other catigories you may need. But if you can save as much as possible-the idea is to have 3-6 living expense(considering your future after school). Consider every expense you may have: Rent, Electric, Water, Gas(if in your area), Cable, Internet, Phone, Rental Insurance, Food-(I may have missed some but you have the idea-right... So you will need at least 3 but as much as 6 months of living expense. Before you set out on your own, make sure that you can afford where you are going. You can always call apartment complexes in your area and ask them questions now to get an idea requirements for renting, prices of apartments, deposits, etc. Compare prices-but go as small as you can. Roommates are not a real good situation-they can skip out and your left owing on a larger than you can afford apartment-unless you make more than enough to cover the amount and all living expenses monthly-but roommates can ruin your credit.(I've been in the apartment industry for years and I don't see many good roommate situations) NEVER< EVER get a credit card>>>> When you have 3-6 months living expense and a job that can afford the home you consider then you can go get that apartment-of course your out of school and 18. Remember that you have most of 2 years to save 3-6 months expenses. This money would not be spent unless you lost your job when you are out on your own-And you would have an active budget that you consider: Like in my situation: I get paid 2 times per month: so when I budget, I take half of each bill and put it in, I make sure to have the full amount of each before it comes due. Remember that you are establishing credit by paying on time-so do what you have to do to pay on time. I don't have to pay my car insurance, but 2 times a year-but I divide the total yearly amount by 12 and put it aside each month-so that when it comes due-I already have it in my account. This can be used on all yearly items. When you have more money after you have your monthly expenses, then you can start adding accounts on your budget for Christmas presents for family/friends, birthday gifts, entertainment, out to eat, maybe even saving for another used vehicle should something happen to the other-so that you won't be in a spot. (my brother/sister in law-purchase a new vehicle and when they have paid it off-they continue to save that monthly amount into their bank, then when they have a need they use all that money for a down payment and they do that all the time-but I know I don't have an extra $300-450 per month myself. So as you can see-you can have freedom and security if you are smart with your money. It feels really good to not be in debt-so don't go there. I use a budgeting program called MVELOPES, it does cost monthly, but it is worth it to me and my family. My kid christmas is saved up yearly and december 1, I'm ready to shop and I don't have to charge 1 thing. Dave Ramsey has a lot of good books, google his website with his name and he probably has something for teens and finances. You will find that rich people are very tight with their money and still have fun. Some people spend more than they make-to me they are truely poor. Dave Ramsey is on the radio too. Sorry so long-but, you can do it. Nothings wrong with you considering the future-just set your goals.
Nothing is wrong with starting with minimum wage now. You gain skill and employment history. Stay dependable and have a teachable attitude. This will give you employment history for future apartment rentals. And employment history to gain better employment later on-try not to jump from job to job. The most important thing is to learn how to budget your money. For now you should try to save as much as you can. If mom and dad are patient enough-maybe they can transport you back and forth to work. Also, there is no shame in driving a used car-especially if you consider when you drive a new car off the lot and it depreciates so much. But make sure to bring someone very knowledgeable to be able to tell a lemon from a good deal. If mom and dad will let you save enough to get a car-and drive you till you can buy with cash-then save like mad. Then all you will be dealing with for the time being is car insurance. This will be the beginning of your budget. 1) Car gas, Car insurance, yearly car renewal, and whatever other catigories you may need. But if you can save as much as possible-the idea is to have 3-6 living expense(considering your future after school). Consider every expense you may have: Rent, Electric, Water, Gas(if in your area), Cable, Internet, Phone, Rental Insurance, Food-(I may have missed some but you have the idea-right... So you will need at least 3 but as much as 6 months of living expense. Before you set out on your own, make sure that you can afford where you are going. You can always call apartment complexes in your area and ask them questions now to get an idea requirements for renting, prices of apartments, deposits, etc. Compare prices-but go as small as you can. Roommates are not a real good situation-they can skip out and your left owing on a larger than you can afford apartment-unless you make more than enough to cover the amount and all living expenses monthly-but roommates can ruin your credit.(I've been in the apartment industry for years and I don't see many good roommate situations) NEVER< EVER get a credit card>>>> When you have 3-6 months living expense and a job that can afford the home you consider then you can go get that apartment-of course your out of school and 18. Remember that you have most of 2 years to save 3-6 months expenses. This money would not be spent unless you lost your job when you are out on your own-And you would have an active budget that you consider: Like in my situation: I get paid 2 times per month: so when I budget, I take half of each bill and put it in, I make sure to have the full amount of each before it comes due. Remember that you are establishing credit by paying on time-so do what you have to do to pay on time. I don't have to pay my car insurance, but 2 times a year-but I divide the total yearly amount by 12 and put it aside each month-so that when it comes due-I already have it in my account. This can be used on all yearly items. When you have more money after you have your monthly expenses, then you can start adding accounts on your budget for Christmas presents for family/friends, birthday gifts, entertainment, out to eat, maybe even saving for another used vehicle should something happen to the other-so that you won't be in a spot. (my brother/sister in law-purchase a new vehicle and when they have paid it off-they continue to save that monthly amount into their bank, then when they have a need they use all that money for a down payment and they do that all the time-but I know I don't have an extra $300-450 per month myself. So as you can see-you can have freedom and security if you are smart with your money. It feels really good to not be in debt-so don't go there. I use a budgeting program called MVELOPES, it does cost monthly, but it is worth it to me and my family. My kid christmas is saved up yearly and december 1, I'm ready to shop and I don't have to charge 1 thing. Dave Ramsey has a lot of good books, google his website with his name and he probably has something for teens and finances. You will find that rich people are very tight with their money and still have fun. Some people spend more than they make-to me they are truely poor. Dave Ramsey is on the radio too. Sorry so long-but, you can do it. Nothings wrong with you considering the future-just set your goals.
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